Unicorns, rainbows and gays! oh my!

Aug 27

ameliadoesaninternet:

veruca-assault:

ms-kawesome:

The next time a man starts yelling at you, cut him off and tell him you just can’t talk to him when he’s being so emotional.

I have done this and can confirm that is a LOT of fun to watch them implode afterward.

Bonus points: Tell them you think it’s cute when they get so angry. 

Aug 27

One of the first things they ask you in the ER is to rate your pain on a scale from 1 to 10. I’ve been asked this question hundreds of times and I remember once, when I couldn’t catch my breath and I felt like my chest was on fire, the nurse asked me to rate the pain. Though I couldn’t speak, I held up 9 fingers. Later, when I started feeling better, the nurse came in and she called me a fighter. “You know how I know?” she said, “You called a 10 a 9.” But that wasn’t the truth.

I didn’t call it a 9 because I was brave. The reason I called it a 9 was because I was saving my 10…and this was it. 

Aug 27
sassafranski:

technicalldifficulties:

awwww-cute:

My friend’s dog had 14 puppies. This is how they’re kept out of trouble while she cleans the house

oh my god

let me touch them

sassafranski:

technicalldifficulties:

awwww-cute:

My friend’s dog had 14 puppies. This is how they’re kept out of trouble while she cleans the house

oh my god

let me touch them

Aug 27
Aug 27

plastic-knives-and-forks:

grantaireyoucantdothat:

sebastianastan:

superrsoldiers:

my favorite thing is when steve hides full body behind the shield

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 (via wintermintsoldier)

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Aug 27

deddene:

if i have a daughter im going to name her lizard and then she’ll get the nickname liz and everyone will be like “oh is it short for elizabeth?” and she will have to say “no my name is lizard”

Aug 27

aweepingangel:

i was never jealous of barbie’s body

i was jealous of all the shit she had and that fucking mansion and her pimp ass car and her hot boyfriend

Aug 27

How do you get what you want?

"A little bit like a child, I act all sweet and nice to wheedle people. Works like a charm!"

Aug 27

catsbeaversandducks:

His name is Bartok and he’s the cutest baby you’ll ever see.

Photos by ©Brain Gremlin

Aug 27

Reblog this if you think boys can be depressed too

boys-and-suicide:

Because lots of people seem to think we’re too tough and manly to have “feelings”

Aug 27
Aug 26

So I’m watching the VMA’s finally.

and all I can think is. “WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU LEAVE YOUR MAKEUP PERSON LOOKING LIKE THAT? WHY WOULD YOU LET SOMEONE PUT YOU IN SUCH A FUCKING UGLY ASS OUTFIT? WHY THE FUCK?”

Aug 26

So I’m playing around with “bad translator” and putting in random quotes.

Original text:

Edward Cullen was leaning against the front door of the Volvo, three cars down from me, and staring intently in my direction.

8 translations later, Bing gives us:

Aidehua Cullen leaned on the door woerwo ·, three cars down my looks in my direction.

Original text:

If I was being honest with myself, I knew I was eager to get to school because I would see Edward Cullen. And that was very, very stupid.

8 translations later, Bing gives us:

If you are honest with yourself, I know, I can’t wait for the school, see Edward · Karen. Is very stupid.

Original text:

Give it here, Malfoy, or I’ll knock you off your broom!

8 translations later, Bing gives us:

Give it here Malfoy or quit smoking can quench your diet!

Original text:

Curious indeed how these things happen. The wand chooses the wizard, remember… I think we must expect great things from you, Mr. Potter… After all, He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named did great things — terrible, yes, but great.

8 translations later, Bing gives us:

The most interesting thing that happens. Dude, selection guide, remember … I think we, Mr Potter, we expect great things, and so on. Last but not least, these hiohomostnotbin, but great things-, Yes, but great fear.

Original text:

I can’t go back to yesterday because I was a different person then.

8 translations later, Bing gives us:

It may not be back until today because of the others.

Original text:

If everybody minded their own business, the world would go around a great deal faster than it does

8 translations later, Bing gives us:

If your company is good for everyone. The world will go faster than that.

Aug 26
Aug 26

darzon-lloet:

mittelstandspunk:

licklucifer:

so you all remember this guy from like 2007 or whatever??

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apparently he underwent a Pokemon mega evolution and just

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What

HOLY SHIT

BILL KAULITZ